Dear Readers

Fear not the Darkness, But What Lies Within, The recesses of our mind, The creepy cobwebbed corners,That lingers on and tickles us,With tingle feelings of alarm, The deep in the stomach, Pain we feel when we do warn, The fear is deadly it seeks, The deepest corner of our mind, It's just a story to alarm,Educate and provide entertainment for our minds. So read on dear reader, I hope you find the stories amusing and full of charm.

Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Three Word Wednesday - Nightmares~ Part 13

Three Word Wednesday - Nightmares~ Part 13

Prompts: Thoughtless, adjective: (of a person or their behavior) not showing consideration for the needs of other people, without consideration of the possible consequences.

Uptight, adjective: anxious or angry in a tense and overly controlled way.

Woozy, adjective: unsteady, dizzy, or dazed.

Nightmares~ Part 13

     The house now felt empty cold and scary. My parents were both gone and it looked like my mother had been murdered, if not my father too.  My psychiatrist worked for a mysterious man. Could that man be my biological father? Had he killed my parents? He’d mentioned that I had heart surgery when I was a baby. I knew nothing about that was that the reason I was rejected by my father? Because I wasn’t in perfect health like my sister? How could anyone be so thoughtless, so heartless.

      Then to top it off the diaries that could have given me a clue were missing everything seemed hopeless. I was scared and I felt like I needed to get away but where? Where did the reach of this mysterious man go? Maybe he watched me now? No, I wasn’t being paranoid there were no cameras in my house. Were there?
I searched everywhere I thought a camera could be but there were none. I needed to flee the evil person on that phone but I also needed to find out about the past so I could nail him. He should pay for his crimes even if he turned out to be my biological father. Yes, I admitted that was a possibility after all in his own perverted way he seemed to care about me.

      Had I really heard that conversation at Doctor Kushk’s office? It seemed so unreal. he so uptight and yet so reasonable, his voice soft and compelling.  Maybe this was just a side effect of the drug he gave me I reasoned that I felt so paranoid. No one would keep tabs on me and kill my parents.  Maybe I just needed to sleep the drug off?

I tried to sleep but I couldn’t my mind raced with all sorts of unpleasant thoughts so I decided to distract myself and read the news on my computer. As I read the news it was either boring, or depressing so I logged on to the gossip websites and read that Lena Panagiotopoulos was debut her new clothing line at fashion week in New York City the day after tomorrow.

      I needed to get in to that fashion show and backstage to meet Lena. Maybe she’d have the answers I needed and could help me make sense of it all. I booked a flight to New York City for the next day hoping I could find away into that show and a chance to meet who I assume could be my twin sister. Hopefully she wouldn’t dismiss me after all she probably had no idea she had a twin sister. Sleep overcame me and I entered the dream again.

     In that state between being fully awake and dreaming, I struggled to come awake. Through eyes opened only a slit, I could see very little because it was so dark. Why was it so dark in my bedroom? Beneath me felt hard like a floor, I wasn’t in my bed. Where was I? I tried to feel with my hands but my hands wouldn’t move I felt woozy and there was something binding my hands in front of me and my ankles were bound too. I was a prisoner? Why? I kicked out with my feet on both sides of me and heard a clanging noise. I also realized that I was in sock feet and that kicking metal hurt.  I was in a cage and Lena was beside me. I tried to pick the lock with a bobby pin but it wouldn’t work. I woke up to find my hands struggling with the new locks on the front door.

     Maybe I shouldn’t take this so seriously as a precognitive dream. It was obviously a product of the things that were going on in my life. I’d found out my father probably didn’t want me because I’d been a sick baby and chose Lena. Of course I’d have bad dreams and sleepwalk. I needed to get to Lena and find out about the long ago so I could find my future and put the past to rest.
©Sheilagh Lee September 30, 2015

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Three Word Wednesday - Nightmares~ Part 12

Three Word Wednesday - Nightmares~ Part 12

Prompts: Pathetic, adjective: pitiful, pitiable, piteous, moving, touching, poignant, plaintive, distressing, upsetting, heartbreaking, heart-rending, harrowing, wretched, forlorn, feeble, woeful, sorry, poor, pitiful, lamentable, deplorable, contemptible, inadequate, paltry, insufficient, unsatisfactory.

Righteous (LIVING), adjective: good, virtuous, upright, upstanding, decent; ethical, principled, moral, high-minded, law-abiding, honest, honorable, blameless, irreproachable, noble; saintly, angelic, pure; (RIGHTEOUS ANGER) justifiable, justified, legitimate, defensible, supportable, rightful; admissible, allowable, understandable, excusable, acceptable, reasonable.

Sedate, verb: tranquilize, put under sedation, drug; adjective: slow, steady, dignified, unhurried, relaxed, measured, leisurely, slow-moving, easy, easygoing, gentle, calm, placid, tranquil, quiet, uneventful; boring, dull.

Nightmares~Part 12

      Doctor Kushk injects something into my arm and then eases me into it with words soft and gentle. I enter a dreamlike state and memories like flowing dark water come rushing in.

   Eight years old again, I play Barbie’s, my mother answers the door and ushers in a man. He doesn’t see me as I hide behind a chair. They speak first in loud whispers then my mother becomes agitated and points to the front door. He demands something from her but mother shakes her head. He grabs mother and shakes her. I wanted to go to her but I am afraid and I remain in my hiding place.

    He demands to know where I am. I know mother is frightened too because she lies to him, mother says, I am with my father. He wants something again and when she refuses he yells and then strikes her on the head. Mother falls down and doesn’t get up. He kicks her back and head and then leaves slamming the front door. I go to mom's side and beg her to wake up but the only sound is blood flowing freely from her head wound. It has a metallic smell that stays in my nose and I can almost taste on my tongue. 

   I pick up the phone and call for help but it’s too late. My mother is gone. There is a strange smell that erupts from her body, which even I as a child, recognize as death. The EMT's  and police come I don’t know when, for I’ve ceased to notice. My mind and body are numb with unspent grief and guilt.  I recall a young woman speaking to me in soft tones I don’t understand and I shake and whimper. They sedate me and take me to the hospital wrapped in a blanket.

    I awake from my session with Doctor Kushk wiping away tears and feeling spent. My mother hadn’t died by accident as the authorities had claimed. I felt great guilt for not stopping the man and then I realized I too could have died that day if I confronted him. How pathetic I must have seemed to the EMT’s. No, I had to quit beating myself up. I was not pathetic I had to remember I was a victim too that day for I had seen my mother murdered. Self-recriminations helped no one.

    I had always thought that that was ridiculous the explanation for my mother’s death by my father and questioned it. But he dismissed it and said that I was in correct an illness had claimed mother's life. Had he lied to me to protect me from the murderer,  himself, myself, or all three?

   The man who murdered her must be found, but after twelve years of now claimed memories I still don’t know him. He’s a shadowy figure without a face even in this memory. I will remember him I vow and God as my witness, he’ll pay, I think as I wipe the tears from my eyes but then I realize we didn’t discuss my father or his recent death. Had someone murdered both of them? How much of my memories had I revealed to Doctor Kushk could I trust him, or anyone with them?

   “Time is up Katie you need to come back again,” Doctor Kushk insists as I complain.

   Something about him makes me feel compelled to agree. I think what kind of hold does he have on me? Then dismiss the idea. For I have memories I didn’t have before today and I’m greedy for more. I make an appointment, but I am unhappy that it is a week from now. I go out to the car and then find myself coming right back into the hospital again and back to Doctor Kushk’s office. His secretary isn’t there so she can’t get her to reschedule my appointment for earlier than a week. I decided to go through to his office. His office door is open a crack and I hear him speaking it’s muffled but my keen hearing picks it up and wonder if he is with a patient then I realize he speaks into his phone.

   “Katerina knows nothing. She doesn’t remember the man who killed her mother, or her father I’ve seen to that just as we agreed. But you have to know she’s troubled by both deaths,” I hear.
   “I know but it’s your job to see that she forgets,” a cool cultured voice with a hint of a Greek accent said through the speaker.

    My heart jumped into my throat but I decide to pick up the phone at his secretary’s desk and listen in clearer.

   “And I’m trying, but I don’t want to push it too far. I am a doctor of psychiatry.I have ethics.”
    “Don’t you become all righteous with me Doctor! I am paying you a lot of money to keep her safe and her memories at bay. However her heart must not be at risk. She must not be stressed by remembering the unpleasantness of the past, Doctor Kushk,”

   Who was this man? Why was he worried about my heart?

   “I know all about her heart surgery as a baby and she is very healthy now,” Doctor Kushk insisted.
    “You better see that she keeps that way. I have eyes and ears everywhere and don’t forget what I know about your past.” the voice said.
   “I’ll keep her ignorant and safe. I do care about Katie.”
   “Her name is Katerina, kindly remember that.”

    How odd this man felt the same about my name as I did.

    “I’ll try to remember that.”
   “Try? Do I have to remind you of my power over you again?”
   “Please don’t send that information to the authorities,” Doctor Kushk insisted.
    “I won’t if you do as I ask and remember those who do as I ask are rewarded. Those who do not well let’s just say they are no longer with us,” the voice threatened.
   “I’ll do as you ask she’s coming back next week to see me.”
   “Maybe you should make that sooner. We wouldn’t want anything to go wrong now would we?” the voice said with a chilling tone that made me shiver.

    I put the phone down as Doctor Kushk said goodbye and hung up the phone and then snuck out of the outer office before I was noticed.  I flagged a cab and went home and locking the doors and wondered was there anywhere to flee from this unknown man?
©Sheilagh Lee September 23, 2015
To be continued next week

Friday, July 3, 2015

Happy Independence Day Weekend

To my American followers on July 4th, 2014 on the occasion of America's 239th Birthday of  Independence Day

Have a great holiday and enjoy the fireworks 

and enjoy..

Ray Charles singing America The Beautiful

and Mariah Carey singing The Star Spangled Bannner

Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Happy Birthday Canada


Canada a mosaic of people
Standing proudly free
The one hundred and forty-eighth birthday
Of confederation 
When we all came together
At first under the flag of Britain 
Then finally to be one under a flag
With a field of red on each side
A red maple leaf
 In a subject of white
In the centre
A symbol of our hearts
We love our country
Its people and traditions
We love the freedom of speech
Movement and freedom to vote

Some days just quietly
Thinking we are Canadian
How we are so lucky
To be in this country
To live strong and free
To enjoy our country
So beautiful far and wide
Riches of nature to behold

We love our symbols such as
The beaver and the moose
Hockey, toques, Timmies coffee
Butter tarts and maple syrup
To name a few
But most of all we love that
We can raise our families
In peace and tranquility
Proudly saying we are

So we raise our flags today
And celebrating proudly our birthday
Happy Canada Day!!
Smiling at our neighbours
Offering thanks to the heavens above
For peace as we
Get together to party
As one

¸¸.•*¨*• ♫♪Oh Canada we stand on guard for thee ♪♫ *¨*.¸¸¸¸
and ¸.•*¨*• ♫♪Happy Birthday♪♫ *¨*.¸¸¸¸.*¨* 

©Sheilagh Lee  July 1, 2015

♡ Happy 148th Birthday Canada! 

July 1st, 2015

This video was made a few years ago by some of my hometown people the song is 'Canadian Please'. I love this video.

Song & video produced by

Julia Bentley & Andrew Gunadie

Monday, May 25, 2015

Birthday Week Giveaway Contest

It's my Birthday Week my birthday is Thursday May 28th and I'm in the mood to celebrate so I'm having a Twitter giveaway contest each day May 25 to May 29 I will ask a question about me or another question with an easy answer (other answers are below) to enter follow me at

and answer the giveaway question the first person to answer each day will receive a copy of one of my e-books. the books are below the answers to the questions I might ask below that in the five facts about me. If you're here and reading this leave me a Blogpost below and I'll put you in a raffle and you might win a e-copy of one of these books.

Christmas is Calling, The Christmas Card , The Christmas Angel

                                                                               A Penny Saved A Murder Earned, A Diller A Dollar A Really Dead Scholar, Betty Blue Lost Her Holiday Shoe



Five facts about me:

1.) My name, Sheilagh comes from Irish Gaelic and means musical or blind. I prefer musical, as I love to sing. My dad always said it was pronounced She-log though I go by Shee-la.
2.) My favourite musical movie is Seven Brides for Seven Brothers
3.) My favourite childhood book was What Katy Did.
4.) My favourite animal is an elephant. I love elephants and collect elephant figurines.
5.)  My writing career was born in grade six when a story about my mother’s talking crow Doc and I won for the junior trophy at my school.

N.B. You can only win once

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Today is May 12th - International ME/CFS & FM Awareness Day

Like a lot of Fibromyalgia, Myalgic Encephalomyelitis  and multi-chemical sensitivity patients, I hate talking about it. We suffer in silence (after all who wants to hear someone complain day after day, that they are in  pain/and or are tired, or breathed-in/ ate / were exposed to something that made them feel sick.  Or all three? The days we complain are usually the worst days when we feel if we don't say anything will explode from the extreme level of pain/or tiredness that feels like it's taking over our every waking moment. stealing our life away. The word we hate to say most CANT. Sooner or later that word is uttered and we hate to say it.
Have you ever had the flu? Think of your flu at it's worst and double or triple that, sometimes that is our good day. We try hard to appear normal and do normal things like everyone else so we don't often appear sick. Others are worse off and can not even get out of bed/ eat/ or live any type of normal life.

Millions of people around the world suffer in silence,we don't want sympathy we just want to be heard.This disease needs research, so they can find the roots of this disease and cure it, for more info on this disease.

Fibromyalgia Quick Facts

  • Affects 3 to 5 percent of the general population
  • Occurs in people of all ages, even children
  • Men develop fibromyalgia too, although more women are diagnosed with it
  • Symptoms are chronic but may fluctuate throughout the day
  • Roughly one-quarter of people with fibromyalgia are work-disabled
  • FDA approved the first drug for fibromyalgia in 2007 and more treatments are being developed but most find no relief.

 Top Twelve Fibromyalgia Symptoms    

  • Pain all over
  • Fatigue
  • Sleep difficulties
  • Brain fog
  • Morning stiffness
  • Muscle knots, cramping, weakness
  • Digestive disorders
  • Headaches/migraines
  • Balance problems
  • Itchy/burning skin
  • No relief from symptoms
  • Chemical sensitivities

I wrote this poem about the monster I call Fibro.

The Monster Within

It calls to me, it’s breath blowing
It calls to me, it’s tendrils showing
It calls to me, and speaks in sweet whispers
It calls to me, and shows sweet lures 
Promising if I listen it will subside 
It lies, it lies!!

I give it none. no smile no wave
But it looks at me, as if it can’t behave
I turn my head, acknowledge it not
For life, its battle I have fought

The normal things that others do 
They are not for you
It shouts and screams and screams
But I listen not.

Through distant cries it calls to me
But it’s lies, do not get to be
I close the door, heed not it’s siren call
For in my heart and body it dies
Or simply lurks in a dark corner today
I hide it away, not letting it out to play,

It is not here, I tell myself
It won’t come in and ruin my day
It shouts, it pleads
Ignoring would be a sin
But I will not let it in
I battle on and this time I win

But the battle is always nigh
And my attention will not die
Pain and strength weakening
I fight on the good fight
This battle will be won

The monster’s tendrils extend it’s reach
Fighting I move into the breach
For it’s me who will teach
The monster it is no more!
If only for today, for 
Now the monster's gone away
I can come out to play.

 ©Sheilagh Lee  May 12, 2015

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Three Word Wednesday- Pet

Three Word Wednesday-  Pet

I'm stepping away from 'Home for Christmas' this week, but I'll be back with the next installment, next Wednesday.

Flimsy, adjective: comparatively light and insubstantial; easily damaged; (of clothing) light and thin; (of a pretext or account) weak and unconvincing.

Hungry, adjective: feeling or displaying the need for food; causing hunger; having a strong desire or craving.

Tense, adjective: (especially of a muscle or someone's body) stretched tight or rigid; (of a person) unable to relax because of nervousness, anxiety, or stimulation; (of a situation, event, etc.) causing or showing anxiety and nervousness; verb: become tense, typically through anxiety or nervousness; [with object] make (a muscle or one's body) tight or rigid.

My Pet 

     I was born with two litter mates. Bigger than the other two I got lots of milk and affection from my mother. Then the people came children adults and others peering at me. When the children came I’d run and hide while my litter mates would play with the children and purr up against them. First one and then the other disappeared with people. It was then that she arrived, a single woman alone. She coaxed me out from under the sofa I hid.  She spoke to me softly and held me close up to her chest and I liked it. I began to purr and she said I’ll call you Tuxedo.
    She took me home to what she called an apartment, a small space where I could run and peer out a window way up high. I thought that she would always be there, but every day she left for hours at a time and I wait watching out the window looking at the sky until she come home and fill my dishes again. She seemed unhappy that I’d claw her furniture and put rents in the flimsy material. Didn’t she understand that need? Silly human. One day she took me to a man, a vet she called him and I grew tense and very scared. He plunged a pointing thing into me and it hurt my bum. When I woke up she wasn’t there I was in a cage and my back feet hurt. I my claws and panicked they weren’t there. What had this vet done to me? When the man came hissed and bit him. He snarled. Still no sweet lady. Had she forgotten me?  
    She came and took me home; but not for long soon she took me to another place where there were many animals in cages. I cried and whimpered for her to come back but she didn’t.
    I was taken home with another lady who kept me four years then returned me to my cage.  When people came, I decided I would not be friendly. Why should I?  Attached to a human, I thought I owned them and then they’d return me like a sweater, or something brought home in a bag. I deserved better; but then she walked in an older lady with waves of sadness and loneliness coming off of her. She needed me I could sense it. She seemed awkward at first not knowing how to communicate with me. I could tell she’d never been around cats but that was okay. Trainable might be a better choice. Look at those humans that took me home they thought they knew all about cats but condemned me for being me. She would make a better pet.
    I sauntered up to the front of the cage and purred at her and she was hooked. She then passed some paper over to the people who help him in the cage and they took him out and passed her to the lady. I purred in her arms and I felt her melt. 
    She took me home and with her there was no silly baby talk. No, she talked to me like I was rightfully her companion. She called me Rudolph Valentino, a fitting name much better than that silly Tuxedo name. She shortened it to Rudy and I responded to it. We became the best of friends as I taught her how I always sat where I liked whether it was in her lap, in her favourite chair, or under the covers in our bed. I even nibble at her toast out of politeness. I would greet our guests at the door or by joining them while they sat at the table jumping up on the table and accepting their petting me.  I turned on the light on the table with my paw when it grew dark; my pet was well cared for.
    Two of her frequent visitors came every week and when they left they take her out of the house; but they always brought her back with food for her and me. They never let us go hungry, so when they came I always greeted them and let them pet me.
   She’d notice when I didn’t feel well and take me to a nice lady vet who’d make me feel better.  She allowed me to race back and forth in her house and  when her two frequent visitors brought a fireplace for her and me I lay before it basking in the warmth meant for me. A King of all I surveyed, she was my captive audience; she talked to me and I’d answer back making her feel better and alive for I had grown to love my pet. I soon found that years had passed. I was still pampered by her, but I felt the pain in my joints and the quickening of old age but then so did she. We conforted each other in our joint pains. My stomach wasn’t what it once was so she had the vet put me on special foods easier to digest. I was happy and I showed her that. I pounced on her lap when she sat to watch the funny box with the pictures on it. I crawled under the sheets and blankets and cuddled up sleeping at her side.
     This morning I awoke cold and not feeling myself. I felt the quickening and knew I didn’t have long. I hid under the dresser, but my pet found me. She pulled me out and then seemed scared understanding what occurred to me. She rushed me to the vet but the doctor didn’t understand; not like my pet and she sent me home. When we arrived home I couldn’t get out of the carrier. I felt weird as I shook and my face contorted. This was my time. I had a wonderful life with my pet this eleven long years, but it was my time. The time everyone gets on this earth, for I lay dying. I wanted to comfort my pet who had suffered so many losses, but I could not. I looked at her my pet and wondered how she would go on without me? Who would greet her in the morning? Get her up to see the sunrise? Who would she share her breakfast, with lunch, dinner? who would play with her and pat her face? I gazed up into her face with love and then glanced at her child who had come in my hour of need. She had her children that would have to be enough. At peace, I closed my eyes one last time and embraced the light.  Goodbye my pet.

RIP Rudy 04/22/2000- 07/04/2015

©Sheilagh Lee  April, 8, 2015